Hate Speech

After visiting the Free Speech Museum's Hate Speech page, I learned that hate speech is actually protected under the First Amendment, something that totally surprised me. Hate speech includes harmful and offensive phrases, slurs, names, etc. that target a certain person or group based on various factors including their race, ethnicity, sexual orientation, religious beliefs, etc. Anyone is allowed to engage in hate speech since it falls under the First Amendment. It seems like hate speech is not regulated on the Web since I have heard of sites that are dedicated to express hate towards certain groups do exist. I think hate speech should be regulated and censored because it causes harm to others. Although we are entitled to freedom of speech, I think allowing these sites to exist promotes hatred towards others, which could possibly lead to people getting together to come up with more violent acts of hate, including physical harm or threats. I am a believer that if one has nothing nice to say, then it should not be said at all. Doing so would just cause more tension between the two parties. Although censoring hate speech does violate our constitutional right to freedom of speech, we live in a society where discrimination is prohibited. The way I see it, hate speech is just another form of discrimination. Other less formal ways of reducing hate speech may be through restricting hate speech so that it is not public. Perhaps we can encourage other alternatives like writing in a private journal rather than voicing hate speech through the public web.

Language Allows Hypothetical Thoughts

I found the concept on language and how it allows hypothetical thought in Chapter 4 really interesting. The author describes how language allows us to "contemplate things that have no real existence" (p. 101). For some reason, the first thing that popped in my head when I read this was how I always think about ghosts. Although I have never seen one for myself, there are many ghost stories that I have heard and I have also had friends that tell me about their experiences with ghosts and how they can see them from time to time. It is especially annoying late at night when I am at my apartment alone, and lie in bed, but cannot seem to get my mind off the hypothetical existence of ghosts. Despite that I have not had any personal encounters with ghosts in my present situation and have not even had anything eerie and supernatural happen, the idea of ghosts continue to frighten me. 

Melting Pot..or Not?

I have often heard America described as a "melting pot". However, there has been a lot of criticism that describing the U.S. as a melting pot meant that everyone was supposed to fit under the American standard. In one of my other Health Science classes, we also discussed this topic and rather than calling the U.S. a "melting pot", we thought it was much more appropriate to call it a salad bowl. Unlike a melting pot society where it is assumed everyone will "melt" and blend into one, the salad bowl allows all the different cultures and people to co-exist under one society. Similar to Jackson's metaphor as the U.S. as a quilt, everyone can be their own unique individual self and each person will be accepted in society, regardless of their differences. In a salad bowl society that embraces the diverse characteristics, personalities and attributes that make our society so wonderful, people will not feel obligated to fit in with the dominant societal views.

Now & Then

For this assignment, I interviewed my parents about their roles when they were 20. According to my mom, when she was 20, she was expected to help around the house, find a husband, start a family, and find a job. She also mentioned that women were expected to act conservatively, be very lady-like, and once married, were supposed to be the caretaker of the family at home, watch the children, and make sure there was a meal on the table. It was frowned upon women to cuss, dress too revealing, drink, smoke, and engage in premarital sex. As for my dad, he said when he was 20, his main goal was also to find a job that was successful enough to support his family. Since my dad had a lot of siblings growing up and was one of the older ones, he was also expected to help look out for his younger siblings and set an example for them. It was much more acceptable for men to smoke, drink, etc. When I asked about expectations regarding education, both said it was not expected that they went to college, but instead go straight to finding a job.

It was a bit harder trying to find someone to interview who is 40 years older. However, I managed to hunt down two of the staff members that I work with. When Mary was 20, she said it was expected that women were married by then and were starting their own families. They were expected to stay at home, clean, cook, take care of the kids and cater to their husbands. Inappropriate behavior for women included being "rebellious", which meant they were expected to be obedient of their husbands or parents, and did not have much say. Women were expected to keep their opinions to themselves if it was not what the husband or father wanted. As for Terry, when he was 20, men were expected to be ambitious and successful in starting their careers, be gentlemen, be the breadwinners, and extend their family lineage. Inappropriate behavior for men included being lazy and rude.

Today, society's expectations as far as gender roles have changed drastically. Before, it seemed like men were much more driven and respectful. Nowadays, they have become lazier and arrogant. As for women, their roles have become much more assertive, respected, and have much more freedom in terms of voicing their opinions and being allowed to engage in riskier behavior. In addition, I noticed that men and women today are getting married at a later age and most want to get their careers settled before starting a family and are expected to go to college. All in all, society's expectations are continuously shifting.

Guidelines to Improving Self-Concept

A topic in Chapter Two that I found interesting is the set of guidelines they discuss to help improve self-concept. According to the book, self-concept is a process in which an individual sees him or herself as unique from others and their surroundings. To improve our self-concept, there are four guidelines we should follow:

1. Make a firm commitment to personal growth- if we want to change our current self, we must really dedicate ourselves and consciously work towards our goal. As stated, change is a process and takes time. It may be difficult to change because we are already so comfortable and used to our current behavior. We must also be consistent and keep our mindset on the goal.

2. Gain & use knowledge to support personal growth- As a part of life, we grow and make mistakes. However, we should take those mistakes and learn from them. Each mistake is a lesson and opportunity for growth so that next time, we know from our past experiences and current knowledge, what we should continue or dismiss.

3. Set realistic & fair goals- It is important to set goals that are not too overwhelming. A good way I learned to do this is to set SMART goals, which stands for Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Relevant, & Timely. Goal descriptions need to be specific rather than vague, measurable so that we can assess our progress, attainable (or realistic), relevant to our overall desired outcome, and has a certain date of when the goal should be achieved by. If the goal we create is too perfect and unrealistic, we are basically setting ourselves up for failure. Taking baby steps and setting various short-term goals may be easier to attain.

4. Seek contexts that support personal change- Change is a complex process and being in the right environment is important. We must place ourselves in a positive, supportive environment and avoid negativity. A positive environment is being with people who are encouraging, whereas a negative environment can include self-sabotage by putting ourselves down. We must believe in ourselves and give ourselves that extra push to achieve change.

Race & Identity

Race is a way of classifying others and ourselves into a certain identity. Race is closely associated with ethnicity, which can be used to define various characteristics such as where we or our ancestors are from geographically, what cultural backgrounds we share, etc. I think race is a pretty useful way of classifying ourselves, but I also think that it depends on what is being measured. For example, race would be vital in observing health disparities to determine which race is suffering more from a certain disparity compared to the general population. If we analyze the prevalence or incidence rate of a certain race, it can help us determine whether or not the cause of the disparity is linked to their race or ethnicity. I guess using race to classify people is useful when it comes to social matters. As far as allowing people to check more than one race when filling out the U.S. Census Bureau, I think it should not matter how many one checks. I feel like it is inaccurate to check that one is simply Asian if the person is half Vietnamese and half Italian.

Interpersonal Communication is Meaning Creating

In chapter 1, the book outlines the various functions that interpersonal communication serves. One that I found really interesting is that interpersonal communication is "meaning creating" (p. 23). In this concept, it is explained that the more we communicate with one another, the more meaning we create and the stronger our relationship is with that person. Included is the quote, "bistari, bistari", that when translated, means "go slowly, go gradually". This reminds me of the story of the hare and the turtle, which has taught us the meaning of "slow and steady wins the race". Like the story of the hare and the turtle, I think "bistari, bistari" has a very similar meaning. The way I interpret it, the more time and effort we put into truly getting to know someone, the steadier the relationship will grow. In addition, the more meaningful the relationship will become, rather than rushing into a relationship with someone, which may cause one to misunderstand the other if the other acts unexpectedly. The more time we put into a relationship, the more we can explore the other person and really understand how they think, how they act, why they act that way, etc. When we are aware of this, it enables us to communicate with them more effectively.

A Growing Relationship

One relationship of mine that has grown over time is the relationship I have with one of my best friends, Dea Kim. I first met Dea through one of our mutual friends we were both close to. It started off well right off the bat since we shared a mutual friend and eventually, I started seeing her more and more. It started off as an I-You relationship where we would engage in small talk about how our day went, how her organization was going, etc. We talked about topics that were not very in depth or personal. We stayed away from topics on problems we were having with our boyfriends or at home, negative feelings or opinions we had on something, etc. However, as I hung out more with both Dea and our other mutual friend, we became more comfortable with each other and found common ground. We began talking about our personal lives more, and became more open with one another. Now, our relationship has blossomed into an I-Thou relationship where we can share anything and everything with one another including embarrassing stories, drama and stress in our lives, and sometimes even talk about sex.