Thursday, March 1, 2012

Forms of Nonlistening

A  lot of the forms of nonlistening sound very familiar to me. I think I have encountered each one and have been guilty of a few as well. In my communication, a common form of nonlistening I have engaged in is pseudolistening. Sometimes when I talk to friends, they would tell me about a situation that they may be concerned about and sometimes I tend to be preoccupied texting someone else rather than actively listening. Furthermore, sometimes they come visit me at work and try to update me on a situation, even though I am busy doing work for my boss. I also do not enjoy talking on the phone for pleasure and try to avoid it because I am always distracted doing other things while I'm on the phone with someone. I feel like it is bothersome because they are keeping me from being productive and would rather wait to see them in person to really talk to them. A way to overcome pseudolistening when communicating with others may be to put my phone away where I can not see it or hear it when I get a notification. That way, I won't be so tempted to see what's on my phone and actually listen to others. Another way to overcome pseudolistening is to have my friends talk to me outside of work when I do not have other tasks to finish. Instead, I can ask them to grab dinner sometime to really listen and provide feedback.

2 comments:

  1. Hey Michelle DeLano,

    I, like you, am also guilty of psuedolistening and share some similar moments as well. We do it because it is a habit and not because it is intentional. I know I don't like to be bothered with lengthy conversations when I'm busy at work, so I just nod my head and say things like "Yeah. That's cool" and other things. I like one of your ways to overcome psuedolistening by postponing the conversation to a more convenient time for both of you. That way, you have no distractions and you can listen honestly and have a more genuine conversation.

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  2. Wow, I related everything about your post to myself and honestly, I cannot deny any it. I am guilty when it comes to pseudolistening as well. As silly as it sounds, I always tried to multi-task when it comes to all aspects of my life. From doing my work to talking to my friends, I had tried to balance two tasks at once. There was no funny business involved that quite frankly, it was a difficult job to handle. Like yourself, I do not enjoy talking to others when I am busy focusing on another task. I always tried to avoid communicating with others as much as I can, but it never seems to work. I also am one of those people who cannot pry themselves off of their phone. I constantly check the device and I am always interested in what is going on with the rest of the world. I am glad that you wrote this post! Great job!

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